


Dawn Is A Feeling

by slightlyjillian



Series: The Negotiation Of Lineage [4]
Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: Action/Adventure, Age of Sail, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Bromance, F/M, Non-Graphic Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-07-04
Updated: 2010-07-08
Packaged: 2017-10-10 09:37:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,633
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/98226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slightlyjillian/pseuds/slightlyjillian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>continuation of <i>Tales Of the Future Already In the Past</i> and The Negotiation Of Lineage series. Fantasy AU. Regardless of what he wants, a man has to work with what he's given.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. What You Wanted To See

**Author's Note:**

> The Negotiation Of Lineage would have been a stand alone without the encouragement of Alithea. Thanks!

The dark thundercloud delivered the rain it had promised all morning. Nichol kept in the trees not far from the kings road because he didn't trust himself to remember the terrain well enough. Getting wet did little to hinder him further as the clothes he wore had already been soaked in the city's river as he'd made his escape through the channel. Then they had dried, stiff and awkward, rubbing his skin raw as he moved hastily to the south.

He pushed his fingers into his hair and nearly laughed when he saw the river again. He had to cross it. The mud pulled at his feet and he briefly lost his footing when his boot slipped on the flattened grass along the banks.

In his youth, such a blunder would either have been the result of his coltish clumsiness or, more likely, the pranks of his peers. He would blush under the humiliation, but chuckled bitterly at himself along with the rest. Eventually it seemed all good fun to everyone, even if it didn't feel right to a younger boy.

The rain had let up somewhat so the trees did not bend their branches as low with the cracking of their bark. Plowing through the narrow bend of the river, Nichol kept along one trunk which spanned the distance and had fallen some time ago from the way vegetation grew over its broken width.

The exertion prevented him from thinking too much about what he'd left behind. Over and over he'd imagined a single-handed, heroic effort, a wildly improbably gamble, to overcome the Peacecraft kingdom, rescue his friends and end the regional conflict.

Trowa was clever. He'd catch onto Nichol's escape and then Milliardo Peacecraft would have no leverage holding the Gundam knight to the Peacecraft will. Trowa did what he wanted to do anyway.

Nichol found roots with which he could pull himself up the other side. The sky threw down rain with more force then and a breeze blew against Nichol's back to push past and rustle the leaves into a deeper percussion.

The leaves on the third colony had sounded different. Nichol remembered the sacrifice that Trowa had been willing to make for Nichol to complete _his_ mission of transporting Heero Yuy's daughter to her island colony.

"It's not the same," Nichol muttered to himself. Unlike Trowa, Nichol had sworn his allegiance to the Schbeiker family. Hilde had commanded him to return. That's what he was doing.

^^^

Continuing without much rest, Nichol reached the first break into the farmlands the next day. He waded into the edge of the crops, pushed down a thick patch of weeds with large circular leaves and crouched down to sleep hidden in the field. The plant had a fuzzy, almost velvet texture under his cheek.

^^^

He didn't mean to sleep long, except nothing roused him until he heard the shake of a horse wearing too much metal like bells. Someone was whistling.

Nichol rolled over, still low to the ground and pushed forward on his elbows between the crops. The sun had returned with not a single cloud visible in the snatches of sky through the green leaves above him.

The horse and rider were alone. For a brief moment, Nichol's attention was held captive by the fine creature, a blood red color with a black mane. Then he peered upward at the man.

Pushing himself up, Nichol stayed near the edge of the field but waved one arm. His shoulder ached from the stiffness of the journey. "Well met, Duo Maxwell..."

Before he took Halyna to the colonies, Nichol remembered hearing that this Gundam knight had changed sides to fight with Heero and Hilde in the south. Perhaps he could get reliable, current news.

"Whoa." Duo pulled his horse to a stop. Lifting away his hair from his face, Duo peered at Nichol with a bemused lift of his upper lip and nostrils. "You are a very filthy individual."

"I am Tomas Nichol." He glanced around, but only saw gently undulating grass between the woods and the field. A few butterflies hopped between the wild flowers. "Perhaps you could tell me the whereabouts of a mutual friend."

"Mhh, I don't know," Duo shrugged, dropping his hand to pat the horse. "Could be that I've heard that name."

"I'm kin to Hilde Schbeiker," Nichol said. How could he be more clear? Then a shadowed thought chilled him while a temporary cloud covered the sun. Why was Duo not with them? Had the Gundam traded sides again? He reached for his sword just before remembering that it was gone.

Tossing his head back, Duo laughed. "You might be... simply from those rosy cheeks. Hilde does blush nicely." Then he continued to grumble to himself but Nichol could not hear the words.

"Are we friends?" Nichol asked, unable to wait any longer. If he needed to run, he would run, but he was weary of indirect conversation.

"Yes, yes." Duo swatted a fly then dropped it from his fingers. He studied the turf around his horse's hooves, then swung his leg over. "I suppose you'll want to be eating with me next."

Nichol touched the cloth by his stomach. "I won't tell you no."

Duo unburdened his horse, then let it loose to meander as it willed. He sat and rummaged through a full satchel. "I've got enough to spare. Sit down."

Accepting the food, Nichol chewed thoughtfully. "I'm making my way to Hilde, and I've been gone a long time. What news is there?"

"You!" Duo exclaimed pointing at Nichol with a knife spearing a wedge of yellow cheese. "Nichol, right I know that name. You took Heero's whelp to the colony. Long time gone, let's see. Peacecraft tried to poke his nose into the south but had no luck. His troops didn't care for the heat. No one wants the south."

Nichol accepted a piece of jerky, "Thank you."

"Don't thank me. Thank whoever it was that lived back that way." Duo extended his arm into the distance. "Leaving their home unattended like that..."

Choking, Nichol sputtered, "You stole this?"

Duo shrugged. "Hungry," he explained. "And I would have asked, but like I said. No one there."

"You didn't stay to check on them?"

"No," Duo said, vexed. "On a walk or spirited away by forest ghosts, I didn't think to stick around..."

_Gundam knights_, Nichol swallowed back the old prejudice. He gnawed his food instead. He'd come to understand Trowa and respect Heero. As soldiers, they all did things so differently.

"You should know," Duo said more quietly. "Hilde did get pregnant again." Nichol did look up at that to see a quick shake of the man's head. "Wasn't even born. And they've not spoken of any other children since that time. I don't think they..."

Nichol cleared his throat.

"Right, right." The Gundam knight stretched out his legs. He behaved leisurely, indifferent as a cat, and in that way unique from the others Nichol had met.

"Have you seen your other peers?" he asked then. "Quatre Winner perhaps? Or Trowa?"

Dark blue eyes stared into the field. "I should tell you about how I got my partner over there. My horse, Scythe. And, no, I did not steal him from a farmer."

A wind at Nichol's back tried to sift his hair, but failed. Nichol lifted his fingers to curl into the mess, gently tugging until they could get through. The Gundam knight had avoided that question, nothing indirect about that.

"Sometimes you have to have something in your life that's living, breathing. Something that you can take care of and touch and it moves back, interacting. Otherwise it's a hell of a lonely burden. Living, I mean. Point comes when you can't fake that it's for duty or honor. Point comes when you either kill because you like it... or because you needed to save something. Can't blame a person for that." Duo turned his broad grin toward Nichol. "But it's a whole lot less complicated if your best friend's a horse."

"Shouldn't be killing anyone," Nichol said, to his own surprise. He thought of Lucre and the shrill desperation in that boy to receive attention of any sort.

"The family in the northern palace isn't going to go down peacefully," Duo reminded.

"So what are you doing in the midlands?" Nichol asked.

"Would you believe me if I said looking for you?"

"No," Nichol said after a while.

"Yeah, I wouldn't either." Duo closed his satchel. "At one time I thought Heero Yuy was my best friend." He got up then and the horse he'd called Scythe eagerly returned. "I'm not sure anymore."

Nichol got up, his legs stiff but with more energy for having eaten. "Thank you," he said. "Can you tell me where to find Hilde?"

"You should come with me," Duo said, having fixed the saddle again and pulled himself up with practiced grace. "But I know how you work. How many years were you lost at sea? I heard some of it when Heero got letters from the colony."

"Several years," Nichol answered, concerned he'd get no additional help from this man.

"What a mystery. You're gone this long and you still go back to them anyway, don't you? My advice, hole up and wait for Trowa... no?"

"No."

"Then keep along this way, then go toward the copper-colored bluffs. Hilde's been staying on the far side of the ravine." Duo motioned with his hand so that Nichol came closer. "What sort of person in Halyna?"

Nichol resisted a quick retort of praise, but instead said more thoughtfully, "She reminds me of Hilde, except she's still an untried girl. A good girl."

"People are people," Duo shook his head. "What did I expect?"

Nichol wanted to move on then, but was held fast by Duo's grip on his shoulder.

"One more thing," Duo said, looking at some point near Scythe's ear. "If it comes up, make sure that they know I won't stay angry forever."

Nichol nodded, puzzled, "I'm not sure what you mean."

"Oh, we just have champion arguments. Me and that one," Duo laughed. "See you later, Tomas."

Continuing on his way, certain of his destination, Nichol wondered what he was getting himself into. Then shaking his head against the concern, he inadvertently started to whistle.


	2. From the Ones We Love the Most

Nichol never passed the farmhouse that Duo Maxwell had mentioned finding abandoned and the place where the Gundam knight absconded his dinner. Instead, he met the place where the rocks tore into the dirt making it impossible to plow. In the distance, he saw a couple sentries on horseback and made his way toward them. Relief flickered through his thoughts when he saw the southern banners.

"Who are you?" A blond man asked. His eyes were very pale blue so that they seemed to contain no color at all at first glance. Nichol didn't recognize him.

"I'm here at Hilde Schbeiker's order. My name's Tomas Nichol," he answered. "And if you'd have any water to spare, I'd thank you for that."

The second soldier gave Nichol a pouch of warm water and indicated Nichol should keep it. "You don't seem to have much about you."

"Not _so much_ to drag me down while traveling cross country," Nichol smirked, ruefully.

"Follow with the others," the first man said. "I'll ride ahead to see what they'd like to do with you."

Nichol winced briefly, but kept the smile on his face. If he didn't recognize them, then they were right to mistrust him. Anyone could claim to be someone they weren't. A third sentry rode up saying, "Would you like a horse?"

"No," Nichol answered. "Although you have my thanks. If I sit, I might not be able to get down from the saddle."

"Long road?"

"The longest."

^^^

He heard her voice before seeing her. Even as the evening sun spilled in through the tent, the corners remained dark and hidden from sight.

"Tomas Nichol, I suppose I owe the island gods thanks for bringing you back to us safely."

He knew it was Hilde's voice, but under strain. Kneeling, Nichol didn't look up as he heard her move toward him.

"Tell me quickly, how was she?" _Halyna, their daughter._ "How is she? I can barely remember or imagine..."

Nichol did look up then. Hilde had put her hand to her nose. The girl he remembered was gone, and this _woman_ had a paleness to her cheeks that did not happen under the desert sun. Confused, Nichol tightened the grip of his fingers against his coarse pants. He wanted to comfort her, but she had changed. He thought even a gentle embrace might make her crumble.

But Hilde had wanted an answer, he stuttered only briefly then borrowed the words he'd used before with the Gundam knight. "She's a good girl. Reminds me a lot of you..."

Hilde's body sagged low to the ground but she smiled, wet with tears. "We've had some letters. But Heero keeps them. It's not been all bad since you left, Nichol. But lately it's difficult to remember what was better..."

She sat then, and Nichol did the same. "Hilde," he asked. "What is it? Tell me what to do."

With a brief moment of energy, Hilde slapped his shoulder. She whispered, "Now I see why I was wise to call you family. Just having you back is refreshing."

"I doubt that, I smell like I've been on the road for a year..." Nichol wrinkled his nose.

"Years," Hilde corrected. "And it doesn't matter. Oh she would have been glad to see you, Nichol. Lady Une, that is. She has traveled away to fortify the coast. Duo left us too. But she left before we knew, and he left after."

"Before? After what?" Nichol coaxed quietly. He should wait for her to give him news, but with the obvious distress weighing upon her, he wanted to know every detail. "Why have they gone?"

_Make sure that they know I won't stay angry forever,_ Duo had said.

"You don't know?" Hilde's lips pulled back into another strange smile. "Everything here is upside down since the messengers came."

"What message? Is Halyna alright?" Nichol froze while speaking the words. The little girl he'd kept safe by his side. He never should have left her. He'd had a choice, a damned choice, to stay with the girl on the colony or return to Hilde. And he'd chosen wrong...

"Halyna?" Hilde shook her head. "She has to know by now. But how could you have not, Nichol? You were with him all that time. For years. And you never suspected at all? Not once?"

"What?" Everything around him seemed very unreal. How long had it been since he'd been in the south, let alone in the deep of the desert? The tents used to be his homes. So long ago. He'd spent more of his life with Halyna than he had Hilde...

"Heero's going to kill her, you see. He can't let this all be for nothing."

"Who?"

"Sylvia." Hilde grabbed his shoulders. "She's with child."

^^^

Nichol laughed, "I hardly see how that's possible. Who told you this?" He began to sweat for the stillness of the hot air around them. He hastily drank from the water flask.

"Doctor J, told us." Hilde whispered. "They're all pretending they don't notice. But they had to take Sally away from her ship when it looked like Sylvia Noventa might try to slip away."

"What?" Nichol pushed fingers into the tight skin on his face. His cheek muscles flinched near his eyes. "I don't see how. We were hardly... you think the child is _Trowa's_?"

"Trowa loved her." Heero stood just under the raised tent flap, a pose similar to one Nichol remembered from days long ago--the memory of Heero that came to mind when Nichol thought of Halyna's father. Except this man had not cut his hair for some time and where his wife was pale, Heero wore handsome creases proving his time fighting under the hottest sun.

Stepping inside, Heero sat making a third point to their triangle. He crossed his arms. "I warned him to let Sylvia go from his heart. The girl didn't even spare him attention when I was around. But she was a child then, and I told Sally to keep any notion of continuing the Noventa line far _far_ from that girl's bedroom."

"It's not possible." Nichol faced Heero directly.

"I suppose you will swear he could not have done this?"

"He wouldn't put Halyna's right to the throne in danger." Nichol shook his head. "You can't know him the way that I do. We were on the fourth colony for years. He helped raise Halyna. Like his own daughter."

Heero chuckled. Hilde spared him a long look. Then she asked, "That wasn't an answer, Nichol. If she... if Trowa.... that child _is like_ Halyna. And even if their intentions are a pure as..."

"I get the picture," Nichol scowled. "Trowa talked about wanting to leave. That he couldn't stay on the first colony. He wasn't supposed to even be there..."

"Exactly," Heero cut in.

"He didn't plan this," Nichol insisted. "He only left the third colony because I... _I_ found a way to keep him with me." The pleading tone of his voice surprised him. Heero had noted it with a raised brow. _This is very bad_ he thought. "Trowa is still a hostage in the north. Let me get him and we'll find out the truth."

"You and Trowa have become closer it seems," Heero observed. "Perhaps I should send you to clean up his mistakes."

"Heero," Hilde protested.

"If he carries the order to the first colony or fulfills it himself, this ends now." Heero stood up then.

_What has happened here?_ Nichol stared at the rug furnishing the floor of the tent. He'd been out with Sally drinking. She had met with Trowa later. And it was then that Trowa wanted to leave. Why would he have left so quickly if he'd been planning anything?

Or perhaps it was a cruel joke of an accident.

Heero had been talking underneath Nichol's perplexed recollections. Nichol looked up and said, "Since when do we kill children?"

"Stop." Hilde pushed forward almost as if she would cover Nichol's mouth.

"Is this why Duo left?"

"Nichol," Heero warned.

"You don't even know your daughter. And I can tell you this is not what she'd want..." Nichol collapsed under Heero's punch. _I deserved that_. His lip had split open and he tasted the wound with his tongue. The blow had enough force to propel his body a short distance. His skin burned from the friction.

"Do you feel better now?" Hilde said somewhere with the sound of movement. "You won't listen to anyone, will you?"

"I should listen to him?" Heero replied. "He has been enjoying the hospitality of the colonies while we've been dying here, Hilde. Or have you not been in the same battles that I have?"

"I know why you're doing this. Please, love, just think."

Nichol leaned up. He tested his jaw. The movement drew their attention back to him again. Heero and Hilde were familiar and yet strangers. But a soldier did not get to choose his commander, and Nichol had been more fortunate than most.

_I want to trust you,_ he thought. He swallowed, "What do you want me to do?"

But he didn't.


	3. The World Is For the Taking

For all the immediacy of their distress, Heero and Hilde dismissed Nichol into the care of one of Hilde's guard and Nichol let himself be led across the camp. The evening stars dotted the sky. When he lifted his head to look at them, Nichol endured a relatively chill breeze. The seasons would change soon.

"So you're Nichol," the soldier commented. He was taller than Nichol and had a scar emphasizing the point of his chin. "Hilde would talk about you now and again. That story about Academy..."

"Who are you?" Nichol interrupted. They had walked past most of the tents. A few fires had lively groups surrounding them, singing or eating. One man drunkenly threatened his peers with a sharpened knife. His guide didn't even spare them a glance. Nichol frowned. "I don't remember you, soldier."

"That hurts, but I'm not surprised." The man pointed to a tent, one of recognizable quality. No expense had been spared. The canopy had decorative tassels and none of it seemed worn from the weather. Nichol looked for signs of theft, a missing decoration perhaps, but saw evidence of none.

"Sit here, I'll bring something to eat." He continued to wait until Nichol did as the man asked, all without surrendering his name.

Nichol hadn't eaten since that morning when Duo Maxwell had ridden past the field. He'd wanted to ask Hilde for something, but thought better of it after their confrontation. He thought back on those last silent moments while he waited to leave their presence. Hilde had wiped away all the tears from her face, steeled to do whatever came next. Heero had put away the carved pieces he'd used to dictate Nichol's next responsibilities.

"Here."

Nichol took the flask of water. He found the material cool to his touch and the liquid refreshingly likewise. Another pouch was a mixture of flaky bread and dried fruit. The other man adjusted the tent so that the gathered material fell like a barrier around them. Nichol shivered less.

"I'm Clark," the man replied, sitting. "That day you were in the valley, I was at Hilde's side. She and I grew up together. You might say that it's my fault she took sides with OZ during that time. It all seems so long ago."

"You're nobility?" Nichol thought he might understand the isolation and the fine tent in those circumstances.

"If I am, the lineage is long forgotten. Even before the uprising the Clarks were little more than a coat of arms and dwindling resources," Clark shrugged. "I think the way it went was that my mother was a cousin and she got me from a merchant. Nothing to rebuild the line."

Nichol understood. It might have been the same for his children before his alignment with the Schbeikers. They would have been without property or social standing. But Hilde had adopted Nichol--not this man. Or had she? He said, "But you're not a common soldier either."

Clark laughed, "No, I hope to have shown I'm a very good soldier. The last campaign included a great deal of my own tactical."

"And how did that go?" Nichol asked, eager for news and realizing that Heero and Hilde might have given him that gift in Clark. He could learn of the past ten years they did not want to tell, but needed Nichol to hear.

"We're still here, aren't we?" Clark reached for the flask to take a long drink before returning it. "Peacecraft's troops have no stomach for long battles. They want this to be over, but Hilde has endurance on her side," he paused. "Heero is a monster when he fights."

Nichol considered that. "He has a family to protect."

"That must be it," Clark agreed. "Although, easier on me if he didn't take so much of the battle on his own shoulders. Gundam knights were always meant to fight alone. Which means he doesn't listen overly much to my _plans_."

"They don't steer easily, those Gundams," Nichol reflected. "But Peacecraft is learning the fine art of manipulation. Have you had to fight Quatre?"

Clark raised a brow, "A few weeks back. It wasn't pretty. Heero would have killed the guy if the Maganac hadn't appeared out of nowhere. Although, if you ask me. Quatre didn't want to be rescued."

"No?"

"That guy didn't show Quatre any mercy, even when the blond one threw down his sword. Refused to fight." Clark flopped backward, resting his head against his arms. "Lots of rumors about that."

_"I have another very uncooperative guest. But he's been quite difficult to break over the years."_ Nichol recalled Milliardo Peacecraft's words and all the blood. Had it been the same situation?

"To be honest, Nichol," Clark said. "I don't see how they can end it. Heero needs to move north."

"Why doesn't he?"

"He's forgetting what he's fighting for is a _kingdom_, but that's why they have me," Clark shifted. "I have an extra bedroll if you want to sleep inside or out here is no difference."

^^^

Nichol woke to find Clark already gone. He didn't wait and went toward the circle of horses. He didn't recognize any of the creatures, but he'd need a decent horse for his journey. Something that could buy him another passage overseas.

Especially since Heero and Hilde weren't funding that adventure.

"See something you like?" A boy came by Nichol's side. "I'm supposed to let you take whatever you want, but just leave that one or if Heero forgets I might get scolded."

"His favorite?" Nichol recognized the best of the bunch.

"Lady Une brought Wing back for him after the last winter," the boy nodded.

"Well, I shouldn't want to draw any undue attention to either of us. Thanks." Nichol pointed. "I'll take that one instead."

"Not bad," Clark appeared. "Zero is Wing's match. You have a good eye for horses, Nichol."

"Ah, Clark sir," the boy cringed. "Heero instructed me that any... they're all for common use."

"What's the problem?" Nichol asked. The boy had more perspiration along his brow than the early morning temperature would produce.

"I ride Zero," Clark laughed like one who would immediately stop if refused. Then he instructed the boy, "See if Virgo is still available. He should suit our man's purposes well enough."

"Virgo?" But the boy ran off before Nichol could protest.

"If memory serves, the horse is a direct decedent of the one you rode to take Halyna to the first colony," Clark smiled. "Hilde actually fetched it back. Perhaps a way to indulge her attachment to you."

_He can't know. Does he suspect?_ Nichol tilted his head, feigning interest. "Then I'll trust your judgment."

Clark grinned, "But you'll still see Zero in action, as I will be joining you, Nichol. The season for the kingmakers to ride forth is quickly approaching. We'll want to be ready for it."

^^^

Virgo proved an easy mount and Nichol might have enjoyed the journey except for the constant chatter of his unwelcome guest. They'd taken a few days to gather provisions and consider their options for a covert surveillance of the defenses between the northern palace and the main sea port. The details shifted so that Nichol's original task to gather the information transformed into an offensive strategy under Clark's influence.

Heero had approved, indifferent as usual when approached with logical reasoning. However the leader of the southern army had let his gaze linger longer on Nichol than the other.

_Why are they sending Clark to watch me?_ Nichol had fought to hide his grimace. The shadows of the tent hopefully had hidden his flush of anger. But in truth, Heero's instinct had been accurate.

Clark sang softly to himself, comfortable on the road and on his horse. Zero rippled with strength. The sight made Nichol more fond of his ordinary Virgo. The sunlight warmed less than it had before. Nichol kept a cloak wrapped around his shoulders. The fields were past ready for harvest, and several barren plots had already been worked. One farmhouse in the distance sat quietly in between untended crops. It might have been abandoned except for smoke sent up through the chimney.

As they grew closer, the door opened and a woman made her way to the path.

"Ma'am." Nichol tilted his head to her. Virgo stomped once, then stood still. She was very pregnant and rested her hand across her belly.

"Are you staying?" she asked, looking at Clark. Nichol followed her gaze to see Wing pulling forward. "I don't have much to spare while my harvest rots in the field."

Clark looked back. "We won't trouble you then." He ordered Nichol, "Come on."

"Do you need something?" Nichol watched her expression turn angry. He didn't know what he could offer her, but her brilliant eyes turned their fury toward Nichol next.

"You're asking now? Asking when all you do is take and take and..." Her tears slipped freely then. Unable to stop them, she covered her face.

"What happened?" Nichol inquired, bewildered. Clark had turned Wing then, moving to stand his horse next to Virgo.

"Don't listen to her," Clark instructed, giving her a long appraisal with a shake of his head.

"I'm tired of hiding. I'm tired of being afraid," she shouted, then wobbled on her feet. Reaching for a nearby fencepost, she kept herself upright. "I'm tired of keeping quiet. You can't stop me from speaking anymore."

"She's obviously in no condition to be alone." Nichol couldn't dismount when Clark's hand tightly held him upright in the saddle.

"This woman..." Clark started.

"I'm Leia Barton, not just _some woman_," she snarled.

"Barton?" Nichol repeated, not understanding.

"Not who you think..." but Clark was unable to say more for her shrill pitch and shrieking.

"Just wait until this nation hears how I've been treated. How _his child_ was abandoned..."

"It's the same, every time. She either shouts at us or goes into hiding. The woman lost her husband and became delusional," Clark insisted. "She unreasonable, even if you were to try to help her..."

Nichol wondered if this was the place where Duo Maxwell had taken his supplies. In which case, Clark most likely recounted the truth, although he pitied the woman all the more.

"Go away, get away," the woman snarled then. "But I carry Treize's offspring and you'll all be sorry..."

^^^

Much later Clark broke the silence. "She thinks that..."

"I heard," Nichol interrupted. They continued without talking until they reached the northern woods.


	4. Lay Down Your Arms

Clark moved methodically. He kept notes yet already knew more of the northern terrain than Nichol. Clark broke camp and decided when they had enough for the day. Nichol sometimes went into the towns to get supplies carrying a list of things the other man wanted.

Unwilling to ask questions if they might draw unnecessary attention to the stranger among them, Nichol kept his ears open for any conversation about the northern palace or the Peacecrafts. But it seemed that the winter season had lulled everyone into hibernation.

He turned down a shy prostitute who quietly followed him a while before giving up to return to her bed alone. When she disappeared, Nichol veered from the kings road and retraced his path to where Clark poked a small fire.

"Hungry?" he asked, taking the items Nichol purchased.

"No," Nichol answered. "I ate in the village." He rubbed circulation into his numb fingers. They would say nothing more for the remainder of the evening as was their habit. Clark didn't have an interest in knowing anything about Nichol beyond using him for an errand boy. Nichol preferred it just as well, since he eventually wanted to slip away. If they moved any closer to the seaports, Nichol intended to risk running. He'd done what Heero and Hilde ordered. And if he only _delayed_ in returning...

"Of course, I'm doing what you asked," Clark said, fingers twitching around his bag of maps.

Nichol raised his brow, but the situation no longer startled him. Clark often spoke aloud, usually not realizing what he'd done. Sometimes in the night, the man woke up screaming. When they were too close to the roads, Nichol had to stifle the other's voice until Clark woke up from his nightmares; however, Clark never offered an explanation.

Nichol assumed all soldiers dealt with their actions differently. Clark grew more unstable as the cold settled around them.

The next morning Nichol woke as the horses nickered, making visible mists which hovered in the air. Testing his own breath, Nichol saw the same. It had snowed on them during the evening, but had already melted in the places close to their fire pit and body heat.

"Hey, look at you." Nichol went over to affectionately pet Virgo. Whatever Clark's intention, Nichol did develop a fondness for the clever brute. He'd managed to teach the willing horse a few verbal commands which Virgo had started to follow on nonverbal cues as well. Nichol lifted a fist under Virgo's watchful eyes and the horse took several steps backward until the fist lowered. He summoned the horse forward, then stroked the long black-brown nose.

"What are you doing?" Clark hurried over, snatching at Wing's tether.

Nichol didn't bother answering, eventually the violent emotion slipped from Clark's gaze. At one time Nichol might have asked, _Who do you think I am?_ or _What do you think I was doing?_ but Clark ignored answering as was his custom from the first day they met.

For a while, Nichol assumed that Clark only cared how he looked around Heero, Hilde and the southern troops. But lately, he wondered if Clark's work was changing him somehow. Not that Nichol had any opportunity to exam the maps and strategies over which Clark daily poured himself.

Nichol might as well encourage the behavior. The more unsteady the man became, the more likely Nichol could slip away.

Heero had agreed to see if the child Sylvia carried was stillborn. But that didn't give Nichol much time.

^^^

Nichol returned to the village for a second visit. They would be traveling again, or should be soon. If he was seen too often in the same place, someone might wonder what Nichol was doing. Even kindness could get the wrong sort of information to the wrong sort of people.

The same girl from before spotted Nichol and ran over. Her feet slipped in the wet turf left from the previous snow, but she didn't fall. Nichol noted her shoes were falling apart. She could be any older than Halyna.

"I'm not interested, but here," Nichol offered her a coin.

She hesitated. "Thank you," she said. Then before she ran away again, the girl leaned in to whisper, "Someone has been asking questions about foreigners in the woods."

Nichol grimaced. The south was not a foreign nation, but the intent was clear. Someone had finally caught on to Clark and Nichol's reconnaissance. They had been farther north than before. It was bound to happen.

Hearing the news, Clark replied, "One more day. Then we fall back."

^^^

"I am Lord Treize!"

Nichol had been sleeping lightly, but his eyes opened at those words. He shifted to see if Clark would go back to sleep when he found himself being lifted by his shirt. Clark stood over him, quick and sudden. Nichol sought to pry the fingers from his clothing and pushed up with his legs for better balance.

"Damned woman." Clark let go with one hand and made as if he would slap Nichol, who caught the movement and blocked the blow.

"What the hell?" Nichol said hotly. "Clark, it's me. Wake up."

Clark stared, then shook his head to look again. "Tubarov?"

"Nichol, I'm..." Nichol stopped. "What did you say?" He didn't need Clark to repeat it however. Nichol knew what he'd heard. Tubarov had been one of Romefeller's associates who had betrayed Treize. Tubarov had been the man who had personally assaulted Lady Une in the south, nearly killing her in an attack Nichol had barely stopped.

"I..." Clark put a hand to his head. "I was dreaming."

"Like hell," Nichol complained. "I've noticed. What is happening in that head of yours?"

"Just a dream," Clark recomposed himself. Then his face smiled, "I've been in the north too long."

Nichol frowned. "I think we need to leave." But he found himself suddenly unwilling to let Clark go anywhere without someone watching. His every instinct of wariness ignited.

"I need to piss," Clark said lightly, unconcerned.

As soon as the man disappeared from sight, Nichol scrambled toward Clark's satchel. He pulled at the first document and quickly scanned it, a straightforward account of the terrain. The next was a detailed list of northern cities. The rest seemed legitimate as well. Nichol wondered if Clark was exactly as he wanted to appear, a good strategic planner for the south. Then his eyes saw the word _Gundam_ followed by a detailed account of the battle between Heero and Quatre. Next was an inventory of the southern troops.

_Nothing odd here. A smart soldier would know the strength of his own side._ Nichol shook his head. He had been too slow. Virgo nickered, almost as if warning Nichol that Clark had returned. He shoved the papers inside the bag.

"What are you doing?" Clark asked from the edge of their campsite.

"You've been acting strangely," Nichol said, honestly. "I wanted to see what we've accomplished so far."

"So you can tell Hilde instead..."

Next, Clark was between Nichol and all of his belongings. _Bad move,_ Nichol grimaced. _You should have searched his things a long time before now._

"Tell her what?" Nichol stalled. "You've been doing all the work. I don't see why I couldn't help..."

"Help?" Clark repeated, puzzled.

"With the recon," Nichol admitted, relaxing. Perhaps they weren't going to fight after all. "I can do more than fetch things for you."

"Right, I should have known." Clark pinched his nose. "You were bored." Then he laughed. "And a little slow."

_Slow?_ Nichol heard noise, something was approaching. They'd been warned. "We need to get out of here, now."

"We?" Clark shook his head. "Oh, you might be in danger. That's right. You have an allegiance to the south..."

Nichol saw them then. Several northern soldiers on horseback. He signaled for Virgo, who came to him immediately. _No time,_ Nichol realized. He would fly to the ports. Or the south if he had to do so. Which ever he could get to.

"Come on, Clark," he hollered, hoisting himself onto his horse. Virgo eagerly danced on his feet.

"I should have just killed you," Clark confessed. "But I do like to see a soldier's vulnerable side."

"What?" Nichol looked for an escape, when he saw a familiar face. "Oh," Nichol inhaled.

"Good work, Clark," Tubarov said leading several others with drawn swords. "But we'll have words about your delay."

"Sir, I think you'll be pleased with my findings..." Clark responded. But Nichol paid them little attention.

"And this pest..." Tubarov's voice came loudest again.

"I can handle him," said Trowa Barton.

^^^

"Trowa?" Nichol called over, uncertain. He hadn't seen his friend since they'd been abducted by Peacecraft's men upon return to the mainland. The other man stayed set apart from Tubarov's main guard, but he also wore the northern uniform with an odd, colored scarf tied around his neck.

Nichol knew he should bolt. They'd left him a narrow gap to the west, if he only leaned _just so_ Virgo's tense and ready limbs would carry him away.

But he needed Trowa to understand about his breakout from Relena's keeping and what he knew about Sylvia.

"Trowa..." he started, but choked at the absolute lack of reaction from the other.

"You should come peacefully," Trowa said in the same monotone as before.

"What?" Nichol shook his head. "What..."

"I hate dealing with his sort," spoke Tubarov. "Gundam, remember yourself..." But his words were stopped by a sudden shout and everyone looked into the direction from which it had come.

"Well **hello there**, gentlemen!" Duo Maxwell brought Scythe to an abrupt halt in their midst. "I've arrived not a moment too soon. And possible somewhat late." He looked around and gave Nichol a brilliant smile. "Hey buddy."

"Maxwell," Clark said, as ferociously as he could while the only man still standing on the ground. "I should have killed you when I had the chance."

"Well, I've never liked you either," Duo retorted, pulling his sword. "Nichol, I have an idea what you're up to... and unless you're able to fight off swords with your teeth... I'd suggest you use my entrance as your chance to exit."

Nichol looked back at Trowa who considered the other Gundam with a cold detachment.

"Now. Today possibly?" Duo whooped with his sword spinning, then went right for Tubarov.

Virgo reacted to a touch and turned his head taking Nichol away at a building, impressive speed. The sound of clashing metal started behind him.

^^^

_What just happened?_ Nichol thought, as rapidly as he guided Virgo through the trees. He began to trust Virgo's instincts and relaxed his control somewhat which gave the horse a more confident speed.

He'd suspected Clark of some madness, but the man was actually in league with the elusive Tubarov. And a Tubarov who had Trowa Barton with him. Nichol had last known Trowa to be with the Peacecrafts. Did that mean they'd harbored the assassin after he fled from the south all those years ago? And how long had Clark been Tubarov's man? Was that the link? Had Clark been the one to let Tubarov get so close to the Lady?

Virgo's path left the trees briefly for a clearing. The snow there had been more substantial and had stayed along the ground. In the open, Nichol risked looking back. Duo had bought him this chance. And why had the Gundam knight done that?

He watched the unbroken treeline until another horse jumped out. Trowa.

Of course.

And Nichol had no idea what that meant.

Virgo noticed the change and his gait broke losing speed from the initial charge.

"No, no, no." Nichol turned away remembering Trowa's impassive face. "I can't risk it. I'm sorry. I have to..."

_Do what?_ He had no orders for this. He'd moved on his own toward the seaports.

Duo most have known. Or at least suspected the possibility. If Nichol wouldn't follow Hilde's orders, he could petition one other person to command him. Someone with more authority over Nichol than Heero and Hilde combined.

Even if he had helped to raise her, Halyna was his princess.

"Nichol." Trowa had suddenly come very close. Nichol could see him approaching on one side.

Virgo needed to get to the trees first. Perhaps Trowa's horse would lose ground in the new obstacles, but Nichol couldn't ride Virgo this hard all the way to the ocean.

"I'm going to try to save her," Nichol shouted back. "I really can't stop to discuss it with you."

Trowa's horse pulled even. His sword was still sheathed. Instead, Trowa had a substantial piece of wood in his grip and used it to club Nichol alongside the head.

Knocked backwards, Nichol fell from his horse.


	5. If This Is It

"You _know_, don't you? That's why you _ran_..."

Sounds returned first, however Nichol couldn't move. He'd fallen on his back and must have briefly lost consciousness. The snow had begun to melt into his hair. While he heard Trowa's accusation, the thorough agony in his lungs kept him from responding. His ears picked up on the sound of movement, cloth rubbing limbs and boots kicking through the snow. A horse snorted. Virgo or Trowa's mount, he reasoned.

His eyelids fluttered. The sky was too bright. Nichol realized he could move somewhat. His arm responded. Rasping for breath, he wasn't going to be able to _discuss_ the situation. Trowa deserved an answer, but Nichol needed an opportunity and the ability to give it. Trowa had no obstacles between them and time was running out. Nichol lifted his arm, half rolling to get some height into the movement.

_Please,_ he thought, squeezing his eyes closed. The strain left him half twisted onto his shoulder. He pushed against the ground with his right arm trying to get his knees under him. His chest still felt as if he were trying to breathe underwater, but adrenaline gave him some inertia to the effort.

"What is with this creature?" Trowa said. He sounded closer now. But Virgo had responded to the command. Disoriented, Nichol hesitated to earn a decisive surge of momentum. Virgo might be near enough that he could yank himself up by the saddle straps. Finding the dark shape close, he reached out and pulled himself up to standing. Nichol saw snow and dirt at his feet, then his focus understood the shape of trees to the side and that his fingers had gripped the front of Trowa's shirt.

"Tro-" he started to let go of the dark material, but instead of falling Trowa pulled Nichol back upright by his own shirt.

"Zechs promised me he'd protect her," Trowa informed, calmly. Nichol's weight shifted on his unsteady legs, but he stayed upright in the other man's hold. His gaze slid to the side to see a naked sword blade.

"Of course, he'd say that," Nichol retorted with not as much strength as he would have liked. "How else could he get you to stay after I left." He sagged again, but found better footing and supported himself on more dependable legs.

Virgo waited a few feet away watching his master carefully. Nichol's heart softened at the horse's simple loyalty, and he let some of the tension from his limbs. He turned back to Trowa, his friend.

"This was one scenario we didn't see coming," Nichol said, sadly. "That day on the boat." Trowa didn't look at him then. The stoic man's lips drooped into a frown. His brow quivered. Nichol went on, hastily, "Halyna could protect that child. You know Halyna would do it, more so if it were for you. She trusts _you_, and isn't she more trustworthy than that illegitimate poser..."

"Heero would see it done, regardless," Trowa replied. The words were almost lost they were so quiet.

"Heero's tired, Trowa. Hilde's tired... hell, we all are. It's time for Halyna to make the decisions and pull us all together again." Nichol put his hand over his chest and Trowa's looser grip.

"I'm tired," muttered Trowa.

Nichol confided, "I know you are. Let me do this. For you. You don't have to." Groaning at a new pain, Nichol admitted, "I should have gone a long time ago."

"I wondered. I mean..." Trowa continued to stare at some distant place. "I was surprised Heero didn't send you to kill Sylvia. She's... pregnant. Then I thought that perhaps he _didn't know_. As unlikely as that was." Trowa lowered the sword letting Nichol free himself from the last doubts that he might be killed upon it.

So Trowa did know, Nichol comprehended. His friend seemed unsure what he was doing and put the sword away. Trowa said, "I knew it was _you_ when reports came in that Trant was stalling in the northern woods in the company of a curly-haired man who habitually turned down prostitutes."

Nichol grimaced, "Ah, that. Too many children being born into this shit. Oh... but I'm sure yours will be--" he had a horrible thought. Just because Trowa _loved_ Sylvia didn't mean... "it is _yours_, right?"

Trowa's olive cheeks turned plum red.

^^^

"You need to rest," Trowa observed, keeping Nichol's arm across his shoulders even as Nichol wanted to check on his horse. Occasionally, if Nichol noticed Trowa wiping at his eyes neither of them mentioned it. Whatever relief they felt hadn't changed anything. Unless Duo Maxwell had performed a miracle worthy of the god he claimed to be, Trant and Tubarov were not far behind them. And the entire ocean sat between the men and their princess.

"No time." Nichol shook his head. He knew his limits and he would recover soon enough.

Trowa chuckled lightly, a long-missed familiar sound which made Nichol's already sore chest contract with affection. _I'm wrong,_ Nichol reconsidered. _Having him with me makes everything different. Everything is_ possible.

"We'll go together," Trowa insisted softly.

"Yeah, keep me from falling off my horse," Nichol grimaced, pulling himself onto Virgo and staring away Trowa's aborted reaching to help him. The lean man stepped back, hands up as if in surrender. Virgo kept still until Trowa readied himself as well. The first few steps jarred Nichol's bruised bones, but he could manage.

"You hit me in the face," Nichol rubbed his jaw. He might have noticed Trowa giving him a dispairing look but it was quickly covered with a bland humor.

"Doesn't look any different to me," Trowa said. "I could try again for further improvements, if you wished."

"I wouldn't brag if I were you, _Barton_." Nichol moved the reigns and Virgo moved west toward the sea port. "Your face got you in trouble," he paused. "I had no idea. When Hilde told me... asked me about _it_, I was shocked."

They rode in silence for some time, Nichol nervous he'd miscalculated in making those observations when, for Trowa, the other man resonated with emotional conflict. _Gundam knights,_ Nichol reminded himself, remorsefully.

"Perhaps we should have gone back to help Duo." Nichol changed the subject. Earlier, he'd thought about the option and dismissed it immediately. If he wasn't going to warn Heero and Hilde about Clark, he only had one option. They needed to keep a forward path to Halyna.

Trowa had kept his horse a distance away, but hearing Nichol's words the younger man came closer. The trees were spread enough apart for them to stay side-by-side with some care.

"She doesn't love me," Trowa said. "I learned that on the first colony when we were there... belatedly."

Nichol raised his brow, then wished he hadn't. He let go of the reigns in order to massage his forehead from the dull throbbing.

Trowa continued, "But it doesn't change how I feel about her. And I don't want her to be killed because of me."

"All right," Nichol answered, but he fixed his thoughts on the space between Virgo's ears. A new notion sizzled on his perspective of the last Noventa. He knew his preference, his protectiveness, for his friend. Nonetheless, _did Sylvia take advantage of an opportunity?_

^^^

"I seem to remember during out last visit to this place--we were arrested." From the last edge of the woodlands, Nichol observed the coast and the spread of man-made buildings extending from the ports.

"And I remember our rush and board strategy worked the first time," Trowa quipped, light and easy. They could hear the sound of sea birds that circled inland before returning to their seaweed nests in the sand.

"In that case, we had already secured passage, and I'm not going to abandon Virgo without some sort of reassurance to his well-being," Nichol grumbled. "Don't argue with me on that one."

"Yes, I saw how you'd trained your pet," replied Trowa. He took a long inhale then exhaled the same with resolve. "Perhaps I'll stay on the colonies this time."

"Letting Halyna take the mainland by herself?"

Trowa shook his head. "No. She won't be by herself..."

"And by that you mean _me_?" Nichol shook his head. "I should have left you on the third colony with your sister."

"Then who would have saved you from sinking in the shallows of the ocean?"

"I might not have been in that trouble at all!"

"Right," Trowa smiled fondly. "You'd have sent the tropical storm a different direction with that dark frown of your eyes." Nichol waited. After a second of reflection, Trowa shook his head. He muttered in acceptance, "You have me."

"How did you put it?" Nichol reached over to clasp the Gundam knight's shoulder. "If this is it, Trowa, we'll find some tight spot and fight it out together."

"You'll have my back, when I have yours."

"So well fought they'll have trouble finding our dead bodies from under all the corpses of our enemy."


End file.
